A few days ago I was watching the news and came across a story about a young women named Talia. Talia was 13 years old and had recently passed away from a rare form of cancer. She also happened to be bit of a social media superstar because she was so inspiring, as well as extremely helpful to others with her advice on how to look beautiful while living with cancer. How did she do it? Well, Talia had a Youtube channel where she posted very cool “how to” videos on makeup application for cancer survivors and told her story, hoping to help others. She also had beautiful artwork displayed on her head. Making cancer pretty is not easy but she certainly had the magic to spread beauty. As I watched the footage I felt myself tearing up. The clincher of this story was that Talia had also developed a bucket list of things she wanted to do before she died. Sadly, she didn’t get the chance to complete the items on her list. When she passed away on July 16, 2013 her fans decided that she should have her bucket list items fulfilled to honour her name and her legacy.
Talia’s video Blog
While I was listening to this story I got quite emotional for many reasons. For one, her beautiful videos were so unique and touching. I could only imagine what inspiration they gave to other young women facing cancer. How brave she was! The other reason I felt emotional was that it brought me face to face again with how precious life is, and how easy it is to take every day rituals like putting on your makeup for granted.
Over the years I have witnessed amazing bravery from people I care about who have experienced major life hurdles (Anne, Fay, Larry, Anne and Carol to name a few brave souls).
I often wondered how brave would I be should I be faced with a similar situation? I like to think of myself as STRONG, but the truth is that I am scared all the time. Scared that I am not living my dreams enough, or that when I am living my dreams I am too busy getting there to take the time to smell the flowers along my path. I worry about money, pleasing others and figuring out how to make it all come together – way TOO MUCH. I am slightly neurotic and worry about projecting that image to those I work with. Who wants to work with someone always edgy? So I keep trying…and it is getting better – I have surrounded myself with strong women who bring out the best in me.
Rethinking the Bucket List
For a long time I have wanted to tap into understanding the things that I love and value the most and do those things more….. to start living that inspired life I desire. I discovered Danielle LaPorte last year in the pursuit of greater career happiness. Her theory on bucket lists is a different way of thinking than many, especially if your bucket list focuses on “things” or “goals”. Danielle tells us to focus on the feelings that our accomplishments and desires give us – and not the intense need we feel in the pursuit of the attainment. “If only I just have these things it will be better…. if only I do this I will feel better….. If only I could go there things will be better” For example, when I run, it is not the act of running itself (although the act of running is pretty awesome for me), but the feeling I get after I complete my run. That is the feeling I need to tap into. How else can I get that feeling going on? Especially if something happens that I am not able to run anymore.
How do you want to feel?
I need to experience uncertainly to find my success. I hate that, but I accept it – sort of. I also hate the thought that I will just be conquering my anxieties with success when I am then hit with a nasty case of menopause. Not fair!
Life is so friggin short and precious. Why waste it worrying? When will I ever stop questioning my happiness? I don’t know…however, I try to be more thankful on a daily basis.
The question is….. does happiness, peace of mind and gratitude hinge on creating my own bucket list and fulfilling some of Talia’s? I am not sure, but gratitude for life and love keeps me going and trying.
Want to write a bucket list and don’t know where to start? Check this out —–>Help is here.
Check out these tools help develop your bucket lists:
- Danielle LaPorte – Desire Map (for those trying to figure out what they desire before writing their bucket list)
- The Bucket List – Android App
- Bucket Lists Apps for Iphone
Admiring the courage of others helps us put our own life into perspective.
I’ve deliberated far too long on the meaning of success. I realize that being happy today is success in itself. During Talia’s makeup challenge, she was happy and it was a pleasure to watch. It’s the precious little moments that make life special and I think they give life meaning.
Thanks Leigh for sharing Talia’s story and your insights.
Thanks so much Susan – I appreciate that so much. I think we all struggle with what success looks like. That's why I think focusing on feelings and not things can help to refine how we feel. I love Danielle LaPorte for teaching us that!